FWF Chapter 91 Divine Recruitment: A Courtyard House Needs a Gardener, Lifetime Benefits!
Chapter 91 Divine Recruitment: A Courtyard House Needs a Gardener, Lifetime Benefits!
When Lin Fan's gaze swept over, the leader of the "Hellfire" mercenary group, the burly man with a notorious reputation in the underworld, felt a scalding urge to urinate burn through his reason and rush straight to his bladder.
He almost lost control of his bladder on the spot.
What did he see?
With just one glance, he made the legendary God of War kneel down!
Twelve golden monsters could tear his proud team to shreds in a second!
An indigenous person was transformed into a god by a tiny ball of light!
He even "heard" with his remaining sanity that an ancient deity was crushed before that Eastern man, unable to utter a single word of begging for mercy!
These scenes completely shattered his pathetic worldview, built up with guns and muscles.
He finally understands now.
It was something I provoked myself; it wasn't some powerful, insurmountable force.
It's not some kind of heaven-devouring, earth-devouring dragon.
He provoked the very being that created the dragon!
"Spare me...spare me! My lord! God! Ancestor!"
The instinct for survival overwhelmed everything. He mustered his last strength and, like a dog with a broken spine, crawled and knelt before Lin Fan.
He kowtowed frantically while wailing and weeping.
His forehead slammed against the hard ground with a loud "thud," and blood quickly appeared.
"We were wrong! We were blind! We're a bunch of stupid fools! Please, just let us go!"
"That billion dollars! We don't want a single penny! We'll give it all to you! From this day forward, we, 'Hellfire,' will be your most loyal dogs! Whoever you tell us to bite, we'll bite!"
Dignity? Money? Status?
Compared to the ability to survive, it's nothing at all.
Lin Fan looked at the mercenary leader, whose face was covered in snot and tears, and his brows furrowed almost imperceptibly, revealing a hint of disdain.
"Killing you would dirty my hands."
His voice was very calm, as if stating a fact.
Upon hearing this, a glimmer of light suddenly appeared in the despairing darkness for the mercenary leader.
They won't kill us?
However, Lin Fan's next words plunged him back into the cold abyss.
"However, while the death penalty may be spared, punishment is inevitable."
Lin Fan turned his head and looked at Li Zhenguo beside him, asking casually as if in conversation, "Old Li, according to your rules, how do you usually deal with these people?"
Li Zhenguo, who was suddenly called out, was taken aback. He did not expect Lin Fan to ask for his opinion.
He hesitated for a moment, then solemnly replied, "Mr. Lin, this 'Hellfire' mercenary group is an internationally notorious war criminal, their hands stained with the blood of people from various countries. According to international conventions, they should be handed over to an international military tribunal to receive a just trial!"
"Trial?"
Lin Fan pursed his lips.
"It's too troublesome, there are too many procedures, you have to hire a lawyer, and the disputes can last for years."
What he hated most in his life was trouble.
A better idea took shape in his mind.
A great idea that can both utilize waste and eliminate pests for the people, without having to go through any cumbersome procedures.
His gaze returned to the mercenary leader who was still kowtowing.
"I'm planning to expand my yard recently, and I'm short a few professional gardeners and security guards."
Lin Fan spoke casually, as if he were posting a job ad on a recruitment website.
"I see you're all quite skilled and have decent physiques, so I'll choose you."
gardener?
security guard?
The mercenary leader and his few remaining men were completely dumbfounded.
The kowtowing stopped, and my mind went blank.
What kind of development is this?
Instead of killing us or putting us on trial, they're offering us a job?
Just as they were lost in thought, Lin Fan casually waved his hand.
Several sheets of paper emitting a faint golden light, and a pen, appeared out of thin air in front of the mercenary leader.
The paper was neither gold nor jade, yet it possessed a timeless and immortal quality.
They didn't recognize any of the words on it, but the meaning of each word was like a brand, directly burned into their minds.
At the very top of the paper were several large characters that made their souls tremble.
— "Lifetime Employment Contract for Employees of Courtyard Houses"
The mercenary leader, his hands trembling, picked up one of the contracts, his eyes wide, and began to "read" the terms word by word.
Party A: Mr. Lin Fan
Party B: [Name here]
Contract term: Lifetime (from the date of signing until the death of Party B or the execution of "humane destruction" by Party A).
Salary and benefits: None. Accommodation and meals will be provided (the specific standards will vary depending on the employer's mood and the employee's performance).
Work content:
1. Responsible for all gardening work in the courtyard, including pruning, watering, fertilizing, weeding, and pest control of all flowers, trees, and shrubs.
2. Responsible for the security of the courtyard house, including but not limited to guarding the gate, driving away unauthorized personnel, and dealing with all potential threats.
3. To undertake other physical labor temporarily assigned by Party A, including but not limited to cleaning, moving heavy objects, and repairing furniture.
Liability for breach of contract:
If Party B engages in shirking work, deserting, or any behavior that violates Party A's wishes, Party A has the right to impose penalties on Party B based on the principle of "it depends on my mood," including but not limited to "cleaning the latrine naked one hundred times," "carrying a heavy load of cement around Beijing," and "humane destruction (physical)."
The final interpretation of this contract rests with Party A.
"..."
After reading this contract, which can be described as the most domineering in the history of gods and demons, the faces of the mercenary leader and his men instantly turned as green as the Amazon rainforest.
What kind of labor contract is this?
This is a fucking sham contract! A slave contract etched into the soul!
Lifetime employment! Zero salary! The job duties are all-encompassing! And the punishments depend on the boss's mood!
If I sign this, my life is completely over!
The mercenary leader hesitated.
He was afraid of death, but he was also a ruthless man who had spent half his life licking blood from the edge of a knife, and a trace of arrogance remained in his bones.
To make him work as a free gardener and security guard for an Asian for the rest of his life? That's worse than killing him!
However, in that one second of hesitation...
A cold gaze, filled with pure killing intent, was fixed on the back of his head.
He turned his head stiffly and saw Ares, the god of war who had just gone on a killing spree.
Ares was cracking his knuckles as he stared at him with ill intent in his eyes, which had regained their crimson glow.
That look seemed to say: You're not signing? Perfect, I hadn't had enough fun yet.
"..."
The mercenary leader shuddered.
All arrogance and dignity were utterly crushed into dust at this moment by the most primal instinct for survival.
"I'll sign! I'll sign!"
He snatched the pen and, with the fastest speed he'd ever been able to, signed his name in the "Party B" section with a flourish. Then, as if possessed, he bit his fingertip and pressed his bloody handprint onto the paper.
"Sir! I've signed! I've loved gardening since I was a child! I was born for gardening! My brothers are all top-notch security experts! We'll definitely make you satisfied!"
He held the contract high, forcing a smile that looked more like a grimace, an obsequious grin that went to extremes.
Seeing this, the other mercenaries suddenly realized what was happening and scrambled over to sign their "indentures."
Are you kidding me!
Compared to dying immediately or being beaten to death by that red-eyed monster, isn't being a gardener just like that?
Let's do it! We have to!
Lin Fan happily took back the several gleaming contracts.
Great, we have a few more free and reliable laborers.
He glanced at his ever-growing team of "employees": the Gold Saints in charge of combat and engineering, Ares, the God of War, who was in charge of odd jobs and taking the blame, Loki (the apprentice), the God of Mischief, who was in charge of sweeping and creating a lively atmosphere, and now this group of top mercenaries in charge of gardening and security.
Yes, the property management team for the courtyard houses is becoming more and more well-equipped.
Lin Fan had a vague feeling that his peaceful and leisurely retirement life seemed to be heading in a strange direction, never to return.
He cleared his throat and announced to everyone:
"Alright, that concludes the business operations for this Amazon subsidiary."
"All personnel, prepare to depart."
"Destination: Beijing, home!"